How to decode British English

While in Britain, no doubt you will encounter British people.  While in London, you will no doubt encounter some Londoners.  Wherever you find yourself while in the British Isles, you will be communicating with people from this small, yet, mighty island we like to call: The United Kingdom.  Oh, you thought there would not be a language barrier seeing that you already speak English?  Please know that means nothing.  Luckily, I am here to help you decode a few British English phrases.  You are welcome.  Sheesh, I wish someone had done this for me. Ok, let’s do this.

1. ‘With the greatest respect’

If a British person says this to you-it actually means: you are an idiot.

2.  ‘Quite good’

Nope. This is not the true meaning. What it REALLY means is: ‘mediocre, bordering on disappointing’

3. ‘Very admirable of you’

Hah! If someone says this to you it means: ‘You are insane’

4. ‘Very interesting’

Oh this might SEEM like a compliment or even a preamble to/of vague interest. It is not.  When a British person says this to you it means: ‘what total and complete utter nonsense.’

5. ‘You simply MUST come for dinner’

Ha ha. Good one.  What the person really means is: ‘Please.. no. Do not darken my doorstep. Ever. Many thanks.

6.’I’ll bear that in mind’

Nope. The British person who just said that to you actually is thinking…..the moment I walk away from this convo-I will make sure to forget everything you said.

Of course you should take everything I have written/said with a grain of salt. Which means: REMEMBER everything I said because it is true and accurate in equal measure. Yes. Yes, it is.

Cheers

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7 comments

  1. Phil Taylor · August 21, 2015

    Who doesn’t love the dry, sarcastic British wit. I think I’d fit in quite well there.

    • samdfb1 · August 21, 2015

      Hah! And we would welcome you (and your wit) with open arms!

  2. Colleen de Freitas · August 21, 2015

    Very good. I like the introductory sketch. Love. Me.

    Sent from my iPhone

    >

  3. Yvonne · August 22, 2015

    Oh boy, I’m going to use some of those killer phrases on certain people!

  4. samdfb1 · January 14

    Reblogged this on Life in London.

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